Pictures of the Final Day in Paignton

Simple fun and laughter with the crew after a hard days work (day 2). 

Thanks Adam for knowing the little trick about how to have a safe explosion.

Dan on top of the mound.

The beginning of the final day for the Paignton school project. 

A helper with planting the herb spiral garden.

Jo, the completed, project, and the dragon head.

The completed project and the crew. 

The cranky health and safety worker turned nice just at the end

and went on the roof of the garage to take this for us.

Front row from left to right: Ruth, Cara, Annabie (squatting up front), Perry, Patti, Jom, May, and Jo. 

Back row from the left: Ivo, me, Jon, Naomi, and Mic.

Some Embercombe folk dancing around the pink mohawk migged street musician

during the motorcycle gathering in Paignton. Funny combo? Yes!

Ivo, grabbing the opportunity to sit in the grass and rest (while most others danced.)

A Full Day of Living

I cannot explain why, but I managed to happily get out of my sleeping bag and start walking up the hill towards the dinning yurt by 7 AM.

On the van ride to the school.

*Distractions...*

It is 10:30 PM. I woke up at 6:45 and have had a day of physical working.
Working with the kids on the garden building project was amazing. Even though it was hard work and exhausting at times I feel so energized because of that experience.
In the past 2 hours I have really noticed something within myself. Once the van pulls away from Embercombe at 7:45 tomorrow morning I will not be back until Sunday or Monday. While that is only 4/5 days - a lot can happen in a day, and people come and go, and I will be away for 4 or 5.
With conversations that have been going on lately on top of the work load the never ending work (as is life) I found myself therapeutically in the kitchen after dinner tonight. I was not responsible for being in the kitchen, but that is where I found myself and after about an hour of kitchen time I realized it was a good space for me just then. I jumped to it and took the leads for lunch tomorrow. I think I felt like I needed to leave a gift to Embercombe before leaving for a short time. The reactions and what has been going on in my head since I realized I am going away for 5 days made me really not want to imagine what it is going to be live when I leave Embercombe less than 2 weeks before I fly to America. It will not be all sad, but good byes are something I am still growing (rapidly with my current lifestyle luckily) to handle without a heart break. It is fact that I will not see all of these people again and that no 2 days are ever alike. Knowing that has really helped me be able to have people and feelings come and go without feeling like I was getting pinned down and or tossed around by life.

It is nearly 11 PM (very late by Embercombe standards) and I am not very tired. Finished up in the kitchen not too long ago (leaving it spick and span as well as a meal ready for the 10 people going into the Paignton school tomorrow-Peanut/carrot/couscous=hippy mush), said good bye to Jim (he may still be here Monday but is currently scheduled to leave Sunday - and that may be best for him), as well as saying good bye to Elouise (who I have spent at least 20 hours with with out hands coated in soil together) who may be leaving Monday morning before I get back. I am proud to say even with all of the talk about people leaving and or not being here when I am - I am not sad. Lucy Lee too (not positive how to spell her name) but I am waking her up tomorrow (and need to ask her where she hung my laundry from last night) so I will be seeing her at least briefly again.

I love packing and that really is what I should be doing. Only 4/5 days. I am going to pack light - light as a bird is my dream. We will see if that dream comes true: so many other dreams in my life have been lately.

Building at the School - Pictures

The beginning of the day. 

Jo, me, and Jon/Jom.

Jaro and Mick, and a great picture if I do say so myself! 

The cobb head of the dragon. 

Words for Today and Yesterday

There is a lot in the air today. Monday June 17th -- a declared Embercombe bank holiday. The past few days have been not so typical and the next week will not be either; but then again, what is typical? Is anything really?

A few blurbs from the past few days written as life moved me forward.

In the pink notebook (nearly full actually) the morning of the fete.
Waiting in the pirate ship for Grandmom Franklin, (Paddy?), and Uncle Martin to come to the fete. They may not come - I will wait till half past (the meeting time is 12, and it is 10 till now.) I have changed so much between age 16/17 and now. Last night May and I were visiting in the volunteer office and she brought up what I said in circle about how I mentioned my struggle with articulating and she said she had thought of me as an articulate person. Going to get a chair for Grandmom.

My thoughts were all over and (as usual) the depth of the thoughts in my head did not make it to paper.

From a typed journal entry earlier today:

One of the signs of growing up is being able to see the fact that drama comes with me everywhere. Unavoidable; it is part of life.

My hands are still dirty and painty from the past few days but my heart certainly has changed. It has been hard and it has been easy.  I am certainly feeling at home on the land here but at the same time very aware and on edge. It is becoming very clear very quickly that the people here are changing. The amount of people leaving soon seems very evident and strong today.

People leaving within the next 2 weeks: Perry (left a few hours ago), Mike (left this morning), Elouise, Annabie, Ruth, Jon, Lucy (younger Lucy),

People who are still going to be here include: Cara (till mid July), Jaro, Lucy (the apprentice), Jonathan, Renee, Cadyn, Teo, Mimi, Jenny, Mick, Fiona, Asha, Ronan, May

With the people in my life constantly changing (both here at Embercombe as well as in the various other aspects of my life) I am finding it hard to really connect and share deeply who I am and who I want to become with others. It is not sustainable to not connect, but it has yet to feel right to connect that deeply. Time will teach me how to do that I am sure.

I am sitting in the mezzanine alone and it feels very still. If I were to completely follow my gut right now I would either curl up somewhere warm and take a nap or fly to America. That makes it seem like I am not happy here which is not true. The happiness I am feeling here at Embercombe is going deeper into me than happiness has in at least a few months. To really be able to recognize and appreciate happiness you need moments of not happy as well.

While I am excited, thrilled, curious, and pleased that my proposal got accepted for the SCLA conference that now means I need to write a 10 page paper on Rights of Nature over the next 2 months. That is a weight. Something I want to do certainly – but present and something I need to be conscious that too much time doesn't pass too quickly. Same goes for working on my Integrative Studies major. Never quite feels right and or that that productive but I certainly should get a large chunk moved forward.

I feel as though the shallowness of my words (even if May said she thought of me as articulate on conversation and check ins) occurs in conversations, check ins, the way of council, my writings, and my actions – my thoughts go to great depths. Something I need to practice and develop is really sharing, I love and appreciate it when others do so and yet I have sincere trouble and a struggle with that.

There was more but it did not seem relevant to share here. 

My near future I am anticipating going a bit like this: 

Going to go poke my head in the kitchen and see what is going on in there before heading to my tent for the night. Even though I woke up less than 12 hours ago, I am ready to sleep again. 

Tomorrow I need to be up and ready to leave Embercombe at 7:40 AM to head into Paignton for a days work. Same Wednesday except that I am then going to be staying in Paignton until Sunday. 

I am so glad I am where I am. Life is good.

June 16th 2013. The Fete.

Pictures from the fete. Missing so much, but including parts for sure. 

Centre Fire at the beginning of the fete. 

(Picture taken from the balcony of the mezzanine.)

Nothing like a relaxing lunch.

Eating on my way to my work shift at the felting station. 

Leftover scones (and a discussion about how to say that word), laughter, silliness, 

and reflection of the fete around the fire once things had calmed down

and the Embercombe family had sometime with many extras. 

Dance Crew and the Mound View

Ruth, Michelle, Elouise, Cara, and me. (Missing Perry and Mike).

Me, Perry, ELouise, Mike, Casey (an Exeter friend), Cara, and Ruth.

The view from the mound as the sun rose.

Sleeping on the mound in a bivi bag (which I appreciate because I awoke to the rain.) 

Reflection on a Good Time

About the time the sun rises in America I am awaking and beginning my Saturday. I watched the sunrise here, from the mound. (I appreciate having a bivi bag to keep me dry, as well as a sleeping bag to keep me warm.) I remember half lying, half sitting, listening to the diverse chorus of birds, and among other things thinking about what I am appreciative of.

The sky was light when I rested my eyes for a moment, a blink I thought. When I opened my eyes the sun was visible and probably an hour above sunrise level. Even though I did dose off easily I was surprisingly not tired. I would have expected to be exhausted after starting the day at 8, (it was a pretty calm and in active day – sitting around painting direction signs though), and then 2+ hours of constant dancing to very lively music.

Round 2 to go into Exeter left in time to arrive at the dance scene around midnight. Magically Michelle, Mike, and I met up with Caira, Elouise, Perry, and Ruth. It was really nice being part of a group in that scene, not only that, but a group of loving strong individuals from such different walks of life-dancing together in such a different scene from Embercombe life. We were a strong bunch of folk. We really connected as a family.

It was really great seeing people I am so used to seeing with a kitchen apron on carrying 20lbs of carrot soup, with soil coated hands and the scent of a hard days work, climbing out of a tent, or walking in the rain with willies on in a crowd of people, dressed nice, dancing to techno music. It was beautiful, and only got better. At around half two (in the morning) we decided to have a check in so we sat on the side walk in a circle and did just that. It was honest and open. Even the new comer (Casey who joined our group at the dance) opened up and said something along the lines of ‘it is really inspiring to see people living and doing what they want in life…’ except better put. We even made it most way though round two before standing and moving on. I shared about feeling motherly and very ok with that the first go around, and about how I keep catching myself laughing and smiling because of how crazy and beautiful the scenario was.

I expect to be a bit tired today but that is ok, it is my day off. Life has really been working out lately.