The spirals of my world: The Ride of the First Tuesday Back

Something I realized yesterday that is on and off extremely applicable:
When I think about it - I don't want to be here at college,
when I don't think about it I am happy here.
Food for thought, and something to not push away due to a busy schedule.

My hair is growing.
My hair is flopping.
I am proud of the courage
I am using to hold my head up high.
It has been years since it has been this long.
I haven't swam in over 3 weeks :(
It is no where near the white blonde it once was.
It has been nearly 16 months now.

My hair is growing.
My hair is floppy.
I am self conscious
and ashamed
yet with every kind word said
I am reminded that
I should do what I do
no matter what other people do
and or think is doable.

The songs "Drop in the Ocean" by Ron Pope and "Let Her Go" by Passenger, were on loop on grooveshark for over an hour today. It was that kind~

Day two. Ha. Wow!

Woke up in the Pines
kissed my friend on his soft hair
walked in dewy grass to shore
changed, prepped, and was at the farm
a few minutes after 9 AM.
I was pepper lady and Edamame stripper
A plate full of vegetalbes in the caf
around a round table with
Molly, Kiernan, Ezra, Noah, Gabe...
Wonder of Dance with Christa day 1.
The number 231 became 213 for
Introduction to Political Thought
with Maria Rosales.
I anticipate that class kicking my butt
and helping me learn so much -
exactly what I want and think I need.
Back to the good old days of
studying against the wall of Frank - outside:
except it is not last year.
Still adjusting to being in old places
for new times - will take time.
Constant things. Lots of little ones.
Focusing on the ones I chose to grab,
curious what will happen with the ones I
made a note to do.
Music, club stuff, class work, tracking,
planning, dreaming, remembering, and struggling.
Right as I was starting to feel adjusted
and healtily caught up in the Guilford world
a friend from this summer posted pictures
of their time at Embercombe -
that was a wave of joy and sadness
and of course questions.
Luckily the wave of time sensetive
Guilford related things going on kept me
from questioning enough to walk out
and of fly back.
It was so good to see the pictures and remember.
It was so hard ot see the pictures and remember.
Music and slow food club stuff, music, planning,
and picking up a fancy camera made the Guilford world
(that I am lucky and appreciative to be in)
my present place of being.
Dinner happened. More veggies and people.
Cara, D'vorah, and I sat by the window.
Time kept moving.
Quick correspondence with Jacob which was good
but yet another thing that connected me to my past.
Vespers happened and was well needed.
Kiernan read something that rang very true
and present to my day.
I had Liz on my lap and against my cheek the while time.
Breathing felt good.
Curling up on the soft couch in the Hut
in my red flannel, grey shorts, and real food challenge shirt
happened.
Hearing words, comments, and movement I lay there
feeling my body in the position and where parts met.
I opened my eyes and it was an hour before midnight.
No Pines visit for a Slow Food conversation with Marek
and making a batch of kombucha:
that will wait for another day.
All day today I had a cleu written on the insde
of my right wrist. A reminder, a story,
and a comforter.

I sit with the bottom half of my calves and feet
dangle off the bed - just above the floor.
The low bed and the brown sheet makes it easier for me
to feel grounded in the cubical of a dorm room.
I don't mind my bed so much - and it is continually
growing on me.

A few last business things for the night and prep for tomorrow
and then I will listen to my body and shut my eyes.

Here are a few pictures that have happened since in the past 2 weeks lets say...